do you ever appear to be like a calm pool of water.... but you're a roiling mess of turmoil beneath the surface?
how do you calm the turmoil?
maybe another piece of chocolate.
cupcakes
Monday, February 18, 2013
Wednesday, February 13, 2013
Ashtanga Tuesday
It never fails to disappoint. It's awesome to see improvement every week. It's only been like, 6 weeks since joining the new studio and I've seen so much improvement already. I've been having some trouble with my knee so it was easy to modify poses so that I didn't stress out my joints too much. It's surprising though, to see how yoga has become a lifestyle, and that the people I am surrounded by in the studio are just so calm and at peace. They are MINDFUL. That mentality is what has been missing for so many years throughout my training as a researcher. Being able to meditate on your problems and to step back and observe the bigger picture, to be able to remove yourself is a good thing. Academics can seriously benefit from practicing yoga. I wish more people would be open to trying it and entering the practice without bias and insecurity. Yes, it's difficult, and yes, it's scary but it just takes practice, patience with yourself, and an open mind and dedication just like any other thing in life.
It amazes me when people hold so many assumptions about yoga-- especially about personal injury and the dangers of it. This article in the new york times came out last year: how yoga can wreck your body (click to go to article). I can see how yoga can wreck your body, but that is a problem of the ego. It shouldn't be a problem of the practice. One thing that practicing yoga has helped me to better understand was to more closely listen to my body. To practice without ego and to hear what your body is telling you is so important. The best way to injure yourself is to force your body into a pose when you aren't ready physically or mentally, to ignore the sharp shooting pain or to ignore your breath and your muscles. You injure when you practice carelessly and when you push beyond your abilities. But that's the case for anything. Running- you injure yourself when you push faster than your body can handle (i am guilty of this), without proper training and form you can injure your knees, ankles, hip, back. Cycling- low impact, but again, you can injure yourself when you push faster than your body can handle. your knees are so sensitive to repetitive motion, impact, and use and to abuse them because of an ego just seems silly and unnecessary. Any sport. Swimming, gymnastics, soccer, wrestling, you're prone to injury. Hell. you're prone to injuring yourself when you're walking down the stairs, getting in your car, walking down the hallway, wearing heels, sitting in chairs too long, working at a keyboard.
But anyway, lets be mindful. lets practice with with an open heart and lets be happy and content with life and all its intricacies.
It amazes me when people hold so many assumptions about yoga-- especially about personal injury and the dangers of it. This article in the new york times came out last year: how yoga can wreck your body (click to go to article). I can see how yoga can wreck your body, but that is a problem of the ego. It shouldn't be a problem of the practice. One thing that practicing yoga has helped me to better understand was to more closely listen to my body. To practice without ego and to hear what your body is telling you is so important. The best way to injure yourself is to force your body into a pose when you aren't ready physically or mentally, to ignore the sharp shooting pain or to ignore your breath and your muscles. You injure when you practice carelessly and when you push beyond your abilities. But that's the case for anything. Running- you injure yourself when you push faster than your body can handle (i am guilty of this), without proper training and form you can injure your knees, ankles, hip, back. Cycling- low impact, but again, you can injure yourself when you push faster than your body can handle. your knees are so sensitive to repetitive motion, impact, and use and to abuse them because of an ego just seems silly and unnecessary. Any sport. Swimming, gymnastics, soccer, wrestling, you're prone to injury. Hell. you're prone to injuring yourself when you're walking down the stairs, getting in your car, walking down the hallway, wearing heels, sitting in chairs too long, working at a keyboard.
But anyway, lets be mindful. lets practice with with an open heart and lets be happy and content with life and all its intricacies.
Sunday, February 10, 2013
Whole 30 Reflections
It's been a bit since I completed the challenge, and what has happened? (this might get long)
1. This is the first time in 3 years that I am back down to my pre surgery weight. I've lost over 10 lb during the challenge. I used to run a LOT. then had surgery on my ankle. and couldn't run for almost an entire year. I was depressed, gained 15 lb, and could barely fit into my clothes. When i was able to run again, I did it with gusto but continued to eat immensely. three years later, I still had only shaved off 5 lb of the surgery weight. Even when training for the marathons, I never reached my pre surg weight despite running 30+ miles a week. I felt great, but I thought I had settled into my new "normal weight" and lived with it. After the challenge, I practice yoga more frequently, don't run nearly as much due to some tendinitis but i'm more careful about what i put in my body.
2. I felt good. My sleeping seems to have improved. I still have some trouble staying asleep the whole night, but there have been improvements in the quality of the sleep I got. I woke up less tired and was actually able to get out of bed and start my day with less agony.
3. I was not as tired. The 2 oclock afternoon slump reminds me of those 5 hr energy commercials. And I used to hit it hard. The lab would frequent the local coffee shop and we'd all go for our mid afternoon pick me up coffee break. During the challenge, I didn't have to do this. 2 oclock coasted by with no problem, 3 oclock coasted by with no problem, and I found myself also cutting back on coffee. My morning coffee is a habit. It's a part of my routine. Whether or not i actually finish my coffee depends on how deliciously it is made. On a normal day, I would have my coffee in the morning. Maybe one with lunch, and of course the obligatory afternoon coffee break. I gave myself a limit, however-- no coffee after 5 pm. I have enough trouble sleeping as it is. That rule helped me sleep. But with the challenge, I would make my morning coffee. It would become unpleasantly cold before I could finish it. I might have some coffee with lunch. Again, it would become unpleasantly cold before i could finish it. and if i ventured for an afternoon coffee, I would hardly touch it. I found that drinking the afternoon coffee made my uncomfortably jittery so I would just use this opportunity as an excuse to socialize. I still enjoy my coffee, but it's become more of a ritualistic gesture of a former life than a necessity.
4. I was not hungry. Even though I didn't snack, I never felt the desire to snack. I used to reach into my snack drawer and grab something to munch oh, but I found that i didn't need to. Our conference room was always loaded with cookies and chips and brownies but I had no desire to eat it. It was easy for me to just say no. there was no craving to eat things. But when i ate, I thoroughly enjoyed every bite of what i ate.
5. I felt happier and more stable. Maybe it was because i wasn't hitting the hangry lows and maybe because I actively made yoga an integral part of my life, who knows. But something was working.
6. I saved a lot of money by not going out and not drinking. need i say more?
So what am i going to do now?
My first weekend liberated of the challenge has been almost shameful in acts of gluttony! I celebrated with wine, cheese and a chocolate. decadent. I probably overdid it with the mega deluxe chipwich ice cream cookie sandwich. and felt sick to my stomach for the entire night. yeah. lets not do that again.
I think some lasting changes will be cutting down significantly on refined sugar and processed foods. I won't make an effort to make it 100% cut out sugar because that just seems sinful, but I will probably not go out of my way to purchase those kinds of processed foods.
I am eating A LOT more vegetables and fruits. i think that is a good thing to continue.
I am not eating breads and gluten containing foods as often. I never really ate bread to begin with, so it wasn't really much of a big change for me. Even with pastas, I'd only eat them on occasion. So that probably won't change much.
I will cut down on the meats. It's too hard eating that much meat. I haven't found an appropriate protein source to replace all the meats. I can't decide if i'll go back to all pescatarian or if i'll occasionally indulge in the warm blooded.
I haven't been smart about reintroducing things into my diet, but i have sneaking suspicions that peanuts and yogurt do not agree with my body. i'll have to continue exploring this. I've also noticed that my mood has been dropping since the end of the challenge but I'm not sure if this is because of the change of foods i've been putting in my body or due to external things or both. So I should stay mindful about these things.
All in all, the challenge was a great experience. It was fun and I learned a lot. Would i do it again? maybe. if i had a chunk of time to dedicate to really doing it right. :-)
til next time.
1. This is the first time in 3 years that I am back down to my pre surgery weight. I've lost over 10 lb during the challenge. I used to run a LOT. then had surgery on my ankle. and couldn't run for almost an entire year. I was depressed, gained 15 lb, and could barely fit into my clothes. When i was able to run again, I did it with gusto but continued to eat immensely. three years later, I still had only shaved off 5 lb of the surgery weight. Even when training for the marathons, I never reached my pre surg weight despite running 30+ miles a week. I felt great, but I thought I had settled into my new "normal weight" and lived with it. After the challenge, I practice yoga more frequently, don't run nearly as much due to some tendinitis but i'm more careful about what i put in my body.
2. I felt good. My sleeping seems to have improved. I still have some trouble staying asleep the whole night, but there have been improvements in the quality of the sleep I got. I woke up less tired and was actually able to get out of bed and start my day with less agony.
3. I was not as tired. The 2 oclock afternoon slump reminds me of those 5 hr energy commercials. And I used to hit it hard. The lab would frequent the local coffee shop and we'd all go for our mid afternoon pick me up coffee break. During the challenge, I didn't have to do this. 2 oclock coasted by with no problem, 3 oclock coasted by with no problem, and I found myself also cutting back on coffee. My morning coffee is a habit. It's a part of my routine. Whether or not i actually finish my coffee depends on how deliciously it is made. On a normal day, I would have my coffee in the morning. Maybe one with lunch, and of course the obligatory afternoon coffee break. I gave myself a limit, however-- no coffee after 5 pm. I have enough trouble sleeping as it is. That rule helped me sleep. But with the challenge, I would make my morning coffee. It would become unpleasantly cold before I could finish it. I might have some coffee with lunch. Again, it would become unpleasantly cold before i could finish it. and if i ventured for an afternoon coffee, I would hardly touch it. I found that drinking the afternoon coffee made my uncomfortably jittery so I would just use this opportunity as an excuse to socialize. I still enjoy my coffee, but it's become more of a ritualistic gesture of a former life than a necessity.
4. I was not hungry. Even though I didn't snack, I never felt the desire to snack. I used to reach into my snack drawer and grab something to munch oh, but I found that i didn't need to. Our conference room was always loaded with cookies and chips and brownies but I had no desire to eat it. It was easy for me to just say no. there was no craving to eat things. But when i ate, I thoroughly enjoyed every bite of what i ate.
5. I felt happier and more stable. Maybe it was because i wasn't hitting the hangry lows and maybe because I actively made yoga an integral part of my life, who knows. But something was working.
6. I saved a lot of money by not going out and not drinking. need i say more?
So what am i going to do now?
My first weekend liberated of the challenge has been almost shameful in acts of gluttony! I celebrated with wine, cheese and a chocolate. decadent. I probably overdid it with the mega deluxe chipwich ice cream cookie sandwich. and felt sick to my stomach for the entire night. yeah. lets not do that again.
I think some lasting changes will be cutting down significantly on refined sugar and processed foods. I won't make an effort to make it 100% cut out sugar because that just seems sinful, but I will probably not go out of my way to purchase those kinds of processed foods.
I am eating A LOT more vegetables and fruits. i think that is a good thing to continue.
I am not eating breads and gluten containing foods as often. I never really ate bread to begin with, so it wasn't really much of a big change for me. Even with pastas, I'd only eat them on occasion. So that probably won't change much.
I will cut down on the meats. It's too hard eating that much meat. I haven't found an appropriate protein source to replace all the meats. I can't decide if i'll go back to all pescatarian or if i'll occasionally indulge in the warm blooded.
I haven't been smart about reintroducing things into my diet, but i have sneaking suspicions that peanuts and yogurt do not agree with my body. i'll have to continue exploring this. I've also noticed that my mood has been dropping since the end of the challenge but I'm not sure if this is because of the change of foods i've been putting in my body or due to external things or both. So I should stay mindful about these things.
All in all, the challenge was a great experience. It was fun and I learned a lot. Would i do it again? maybe. if i had a chunk of time to dedicate to really doing it right. :-)
til next time.
Friday, February 1, 2013
Day 30--CHALLENGE COMPLETED!
today= last day of the challenge.
A recap will follow shortly.
Tomorrow, I'm excited to enjoy a piece of chocolate. I'm excited to teach, I'm excited to yoga, and I'm excited for photos. I'm excited for a LOT of things.
life is good. it is very good.
A recap will follow shortly.
Tomorrow, I'm excited to enjoy a piece of chocolate. I'm excited to teach, I'm excited to yoga, and I'm excited for photos. I'm excited for a LOT of things.
life is good. it is very good.
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